Wednesday, September 26, 2007

I'm About To Strip and I'm Well Equipped, Can You Handle Me the Way I Butt?

Wanna know something totally messed up, there was a Rocketboom episode about voter turnout (very timely question, only a month and a half from an inconsequential election) which actually featured some interesting and inspiring commentary about the franchise. The messed up part was this: it was an interview with a Thomas Jefferson impersonator from Colonial Freaking Williamsburg. That d00d made way too much sense to be working in Colonial Williamsburg and it is really depressing to me that the artificially constructed dream-images of our founding parents hanging out in tourist destinations make way more sense and inspire better civic consciousness than anyone either holding or running for real political office. Maybe Goofy should run for the house in whatever district Celebration, Florida is in.

My travel schedule for the first semester is really erratic. It goes from the lame to the awesome to the medium and does so with some rotation. Cedar Falls, Des Moines, Vegas, Detroit, Boston, Winston-Salem, Chicago. I mean, its still very mid-West centric, but at least I go West once. Not something I can count on for a second semester that may be all directed at my South-East.

My fantasy football team, which played awesome in weeks 1 and 2, sort of tanked in week 3 when my two previous top performers decided to swallow their own ballz. I was counting on Frank Gore’s numbers going up as his hand got better, though admittedly, the Steelers defense appeared to play very well. Still, you should be able to get Frank Gore at least 50 yards, even without the threat of a passing game. I guess it wouldn’t hurt if you had someone who pretended to play wide receiver, but I digress.

We were running some errands for Katie’s rents today and stopped at Arby’s for lunch. I was enticed by their Reuben wrap (a quality concept, though it could use more cheese, kraut and dressing, endemic of wraps I suppose), but their advertising tried to emphasize the novelty of the “rye wrap!!” I ordered the thing and enjoyed it at all, but I am not impressed that you have a rye wrap. I would prolly have been impressed if you had created rye bread, but once it has already been successfully formed into a dough and baked into a bread, just making it flatter and elongated does not stimulate me. Make a wrap out of chocolate and I will be impressed. And no, (pre-empt) the outside coating of a Swiss Cake Roll (or ho-ho) does not constitute a chocolate wrap. A wrap would actually contain the stuff inside, rather than just being a coating applied to the base. Its not like you could take the peel of a ho-ho off and slap some frosting and nuts and stuff on it and roll it up and have it stay stable. Those things crumble and crack when u just bite into them. Not impressed. Hippo would prefer you make a wrap out of cat chow. She totally luvz cat chow.



Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Cuz When It Comes to Being Lucky She's Cursed, When It Comes to Loving Me, She's Butt

7 Things that Have Totally Changed Since I Last Wrote Here:

1) I live in St. Paul now—Katie and I moved back here in August after a crazy series of events that lead to me taking a job at my old alma mater. We have a hawt apartment, in a hawt neighborhood, hanging out with our hawt friends and hawt family.
2) Our apartment’s walls are not white—Katie won a long standing argument we had concerning the painting of walls in a dwelling we do not own. Her winning arguments were the following: 1) Her dad will essentially do it all for us, cuz he is to painting as C.C. Deville is to rocking. His hair is less poofy and I have never heard him play the solo from Nothing But a Good Time, but I digress. 2) “Please please please please please please please.”
3) I have way more responsibility—This responsibility is good in a lot of senses, cuz it comes with a corresponding increase in prestige and payment. It also comes with a bunch of paperwork and I largely suck at doing it. I mean, I don’t suck at it, like I get it done on time and successfully, I just hate it. It’s not hard to copy line 4 above to the space at the bottom of the form (like it couldn’t just chill out in line 4) but it annoys the piss out of me and takes more time than it should.
4) I made risotto—This was just last week in fact. For some reason I had never attempted to make risotto at home, which is odd, since I really like risotto, but whatevs. Point being, I really dug the process, it wasn’t too difficult (you just have to stick to the procedure, keep stirring, and be patient). I have made two different recipes (Shrimp and Fresh Pea risotto and a Two-Cheese risotto) and intend to keep cracking at least one a week. Idk if fall is actually risotto season, but I feel like it fits with the crispness outside.
5) We went to a new apple orchard southwest of the cities, not new, per say, but new to me—We have been spoiled in regard to apple country and its not like Minnesota is a huge step down. There are a lot of tasty apples grown in this part of the country and an incredible abundance of different red-shades. They don’t appear to have the variables in terms of green apples that New York offered, but some delicious sugary fall numbers were worth the drive. They were a bit limited in terms of the variety of apples one could pick and I feel like they might have thought that their honeycrisp apples are too precious to be picked by the general public, but it was a fun fall morning.
6) Brett Favre pwnz—I could explain this more, but wow has it been fun watching him play these last two weeks. I am not really getting my hopes up for the Packers’ season, though it is certainly off to a good start, and the quality of the defense is really impressive. Even if we tank, watching him play like he has in the second half of the Giants game and against the Chargers, is really awesome. Loves it.
7) Hippo really loves hardwood floors—Maybe that didn’t change, but she has lots of them to play on now and the Hippo slide is about as excellent as dances are likely to get. She has finally gotten the hang of turning through the kitchen without actually striking the oven and it will likely inspire The Fast and the Furious III: Hippopotameow Drift.