Tuesday, April 29, 2003

Evanston, IL

It was so fucking nice to not be in Buffalo this weekend. I cannot explain to you what a relief it is to be reminded that there are indeed areas of the world which do not suck a big giant fat ass. I don’t even really like Chicago, its too big a city and too non-Minnesota for me. The point, however, is that even a city I don’t really like is better than Buffalo to such an extent that I would move there in a heartbeat. I have never wanted to live in Chicago and still don’t, but at least its only 7 or so hours from the Cities. In addition, the people don’t universally suck, there are people I know, and the entire town does not resemble an enormous pile of shit.

My weekend was very nice. I had my first real full dinner in quite a while, certainly the first one since Lent ended, at Katie’s uncle/aunt’s house cooked by Carole. It was exquisite, a delicious roast with potatoes and carrots. Tasty milk gravy. It was some good solid food. I was very appreciative. It was followed up, of course, by the world’s greatest chocolate cake. I got to bring a couple pieces of this delicious cake home with me. I enjoyed one last night. It really is the perfect usage of chocolate.

I could describe the rest of my food for the weekend, it wouldn’t be a bad way to tell the story. The important parts are, in order: I got to see Katie. I know it hasn’t been a ridiculously long time, about a month and a week or so I guess. Nonetheless, it was wonderful. She really livens me up to finish off the semester, even if I have to do it alone. Though I don’t wish to give much away, she got some really cute new underwear. I brought her a present, which was shockingly suited to the underwear, which is Cheer Bear, the pink care bear. I think she liked it. It was indeed a very very cute little bear. She brought me several things too, though none were as important as simply her presence. She brought me a NFL2K3 game so I have more than one for my PS2 and I will play it this evening. She brought me a cute pair of PJ pants, so I have 3 now. As well as a maroon sweatshirt thing which will be perfect to wear with my pjs, at least when it gets cold out again, at the moment even my PJ pants are too hot. If it was at least May I wouldn’t feel bad about turning the ac on, but I guess that a fan and open windows will have to suffice for now.

Regardless. I also got to spend some time with the Me-ach and the Josher. I like those kids quite a bit, don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to go back and coach them. I can remember at the end of Nats last year where I was so glad to never have to spend that kind of time with high school kids again. When you only have to see them for a weekend once every 3-4 months, they are considerably more tolerable than the whole twice a week every week from September till June thing. Katie left our Saturday evening dinner a little early (she wasn’t’ feeling well (she had a big apple martini before dinner) and was not as intrigued by the Flat Top as we all were). But since we figured she was simply going to sleep so she could feel better the rest of the weekend we had no intention of giving up our membership in the clean plate club.

The Flat Top, if you are in the unawares, is a Mongolian style barbecue joint. This of course, has little to no resemblance to an American barbecue. It really just means you get to make your own all you can eat stir fry. They have high quality shit and lots of it. My favorite part of the Flat Top (which has, now that Katie has been to Evanston with me, fallen to my second favorite part of the Northwestern tournament) is the bucket o garlic which sits near the end of the buffet area. I will admit, I overloaded on the garlic this year. Notably, I do this every year, this year Katie was just there to suffer the ill effects. I went with 1-2 heaping spoonfuls on each bowl of stir fry. I believe we had 5 servings. They were all delicious, but maybe a little too garlicy. Luckily, Katie was asleep when I came home, so she was not able to smell the deliciousness of fried garlic which was, at this point, oozing from my pores. I love garlic, I love it so much. I mean, I would have probably eaten a little less of it if Katie had been there to tell me to back off, but since she was not, I didn’t.

The drive to Chicago is long and intensely boring. A strong majority of it is through Ohio and Indiana. While I have, admittedly, never driven across Kansas or Oklahoma or anything, I continue to have a hard time believing that they can be much more boring than Ohio. Seriously, what a god awful state. It also doesn’t help that all these states feel entitled to charge me to drive over the most godawful roads in existence and hence limit my fast food options. Fuck, that blows so hard. I hate turnpikes and toll roads and all that bullshit. Anyway, that’s all for my weekend in Evanston. It broke up the time nicely until I get to see Katie again.

Peace,

MB-K

Thursday, April 24, 2003

Out of Buffalo for a Weekend

I get to leave Buffalo! I get to leave Buffalo! I hate this stupid fucking town so much, I am so happy I get to leave. More importantly, I get to see Katie. Admittedly, I will have alot of fucking work to do this weekend, but still, I will get at least to spend my free hours with the woman I love and not be in my apartment in lame ass Buffalo.

My classes are all done. I have to teach tomorrow, then I will simply have to grade papers all fucking week to get shit ready for portfolios and the like. I have about 1.1 papers left to finish. Unfortunately I have yet to write a word for Gasche, though I should be able to do it with about 2-3 days of good solid work. I also, notably, do not have a job yet, though I will have to get to work on that. I want to find out when Katie is coming out here, so I know when to tell them I need off to go home. Hopefully that will all get figured out this weekend.

It also appears that I will get a chance to get some of that delicious smokable stuff that I have lived so long without. What a fantastic weekend it will be, the first one in a long time. I will be back on Monday, enlivened for the absolute ass-end of the semester.

Peace,

MB-K

Wednesday, April 23, 2003

Tsup

I totally have no desire to write about anything tonight. Sorry, I am just not in the mood. I do however, want an entry to show up. So I am typing this.

The West Wing Rocks. My classes are done for the semester. I get paid tomorrow. The day count until I get to see Katie grows ever smaller. Overall things are quite good. I am simply not in the mood to write. Sorry, I know that shit is limp.

Peace,

MB-K

Monday, April 21, 2003

Nothing Much and Some Good Wishes

I have had some significant entries over the last several days, but I am just not feeling it tonight. I am virtually finished with my second paper, so it looks like I should be fairly on schedule for the rest of the semester. I am no longer very worried, I think it should be as close to a breeze as the end of a graduate semester can be.

Beyond that it appears that FOX continues to blow away the competition in the reality TV market. Joe Millionaire and Married by America rank 2-3 on the best reality shows of all time, behind only Survivor. From the first episode, the Monica Lewinsky led introduction of masks and hoods looks to join that list. There is some hypnotist motivational speaker dude who has the craziest fucked up theories. I like him already, I will laugh my balls off if this homeboy actually takes it.

Unfortunately for Haley, a pretty cute psuedo-Jennifer Garner style girl, most of the guys overall were pretty ugly and the final 10 have a bunch of uggos amongst the crowd. I picked only one of them as legitimately hot, but several are decent looking. We will see how it goes.

On the bright side I would like to mention that Katie was not feeling well today, so I thought I would give her a shout out. I Love You, Sweetie! Feel better, I will see you in not too long. I promise you a bottle of kool-aid like wine a nice dinner and a long backrub to help out. I wish you could cash it in now but we do what we can. At least you have the magic of the Twin Cities to keep you company. Again, love you!

Peace,

MB-K

Sunday, April 20, 2003

Fiz Twiz

It is both a sad and very happy day. I mean, it is a celebration obviously, today we rejoice in the wonders of a drug I have not been able to enjoy in many many weeks. Don't get me wrong, I love my Sanjay and miss the dude like a motherfucker. Nevertheless, maybe I should have thought harder about that decision.

So I am sober, I thought about drinking, but it just seems like drinking without enjoying a 4/20 addition would be almost sacreligous. I mean, it would be a very nice supplement, but alone its like ignoring the entire significance of the whole occassion. I have nothing against those who don't choose to celebrate this particular holiday, but I like it and it deserves at least a portion of my attention and thanks for one day.

On the upside, I got to have a hot delicious double quarter with cheese. It was tasty and greasy and hot and juicy. I almost got two of them, but I figured it would be a better idea just to wait and have some others later on. After all, I havent had any of the delicious red meat products in a long time-hot dogs, roast beef, bacon, pork, steak (though that one will change soon)-so I guess I can justify eating out at least one or two more times this week. Mmmmm...Arby's melt.

On an entirely unrelated note, The Pitts is an awful program. I know it is apparently made by the creators of the Simpsons but the writers are awful. It is not a funny concept for a show and the characters are stupid. The teenage girl is kinda cute, but is an awful actress, and the father figure is stupid without any of the corresponding stupid humor. At least it is on before the Simpson's this week, rather than ruining it afterwards.

Peace,

MB-K

Saturday, April 19, 2003

Less than 24 Hours

I can almost taste the Double Quarter. The beefy grease dripping almost through the bun as the cheese oozes mixing with ketchup, mustard, onions, etc. Do it up with a big ass thing of fries and an Ice Cold Coca-Cola Classic. Damn, I cannot wait.

Back, however, to the topic I began yesterday. Where was I. I know I explained the not buying into the basic precepts of the system thing. Oh yeah, I finished up with the argument that "to read the letter of the law against itself" means to read the desire of the law.

So basically, what does this mean. I essentially started to introduce it in response to Nazi anti-semitism. The truth of Nazi anti-semitism is not simply that they hate Jews unjustifiably, though that is obviously true. The point is that the Jew occupies the place of the objet petit a. Complicated notion overall, but lets for the moment just consider it the object of desire. The object of desire, as might be noticed from Zizek's formulation as the "object-cause" of desire, is not simply external to the subject, something that s/he wants. Instead, it is what Lacan calls ex-timate (a neologism based on "external" and "intimate"). The subject's relation to the object of desire is the opposite of what one might imagine; there is no attempt to attain the object. This is the source of Lacan's ethical formulation "never give way to your desire." Attaining the object of desire usually is not possible, but attaining it when it is possible would be disastrous.

The object of desire, luckily, has the ability to shift based on symbolic constraints. If the object of your desire was another person for instance and that person was gone, someone or something else could easily come into place. In order for a person to occupy this place it would most likely have to be someone unattainable, a celebrity, historical figure, or fictional personality. This is why someone's lover/spouse is never the object of desire (if they are, they won't be for long) because the whole point of the object of desire is that there is something about it which is more than itself. A celebrity, for example, is imagined to be one way or another by her/his fans, but may be anywhere from somewhat like that to exactly the opposite. What is desired in them is not simply them as symbolic phenomena (their name, title, status, wealth, etc) but what is in them that escapes language.

If one were to obtain the object of desire the disastrous consequences come down in pretty much one of two ways. First, there is no basis for desire anymore. Since psychic life is organized around desire-the fantasy, the drives, etc are all structured in different ways depending on what someone's desire is at the time-the lack of an object for it would be devestating. Psychic processes stop functioning and most likely one becomes psychotic (I mean, you are halfway there, psychotics are primarily defined as those who lack desire). On the other hand, one gains the object of desire and necessarily discovers that the object you have attempted so hard to gain, the object that has organized one's entire world, isn't what you thought it was. I don't think I have to explain what that would ultimately mean.

Okay, time to tie this back in to the argument at hand. Keep in mind of course, that I am basing all this off an argument I have not actually heard and only tangentially know anything about. That said, it seems pretty clear that their argument is that the desire of the system they are addressing (be it academic debate or general intellectual practice or world politics or whatever) is to have women in such a position that they are either naked or non-existent. Don't think, however, that because Nikki and Sarah are against such a system, that their desire is any different than the system's itself.

Pretty much, I will summarize the argument. Basically, instead of reading the letter of the law against itself stripping naked in a debate round is the naive understanding of this form of reading-it fulfills the desire of the law, buys into the fantasmatic system which supports it, and in the worst case scenario effectively grasps the object of desire for themsleves, other participants, and judges.

Maybe more on this later or maybe I will progress to other arguments related to it.

NBA playoff time. I guess that is at least something to do on an otherwise boring Saturday afternoon which continues to lack the necessary weed to make it interesting.

Peace,

MB-K

Friday, April 18, 2003

Easter Weekend

Almost done with my second paper of the semester. I have like 1 1/3 papers total to go. I am very psyched about this, its actually even better position then I was in last semster. I also found out that I get paid until June 1st, which means that if I had to finish writing during the first week of May I would be cool without a job for a little while. It also means that I could probably get away working part time this summer if I wanted to, but I think I would rather live a closer to middle-class lifestyle and not fail to pay any of my bills.

I am actually really enjoying stand up comedy night on Comedy Central tonight. First semester and the first few weeks I was back here I thoroughly looked forward to stand up night, as I think stand up comedy rocks. But then they started repeating far too many episodes that I had seen recently and they werent as funny the third or fourth time around. They could have been, but for some reason they werent, I wonder if that could possibly be Sanjay's fault, but I don't know how.

I am so happy that I am now less than 48 hours from my first cheeseburger in like 6 fucking weeks. Today was the last Friday for like 45 weeks that I will have to seriously monitor my food intake. Because I was way the fuck out here and not able to cook corned beef and cabbage for myself I havent even had my usual mid-Lenten dose of beef. I love beef, I love it so much. I think I will have a double-quarter with cheese on my way home from Easter Mass and stop by Topps afterwards and add a big filet to my diet. After all, I have to make up for the large amount of stored up red meat that has left my digestive system over these last 40 days.

On another note, I have begun to better formulate some of my arguments against what Andy Kemp so delicately referred to as "the boob argument." It gets complicated and probably not interesting to anyone who would read this, but I will rehearse it briefly.

When Joan was talking on Wednesday I understood, or at least became much better able to express, what Zizek actually means when he uses the line "read the letter of the law against itself" which I believe is from Welcome to the Desert of the Real and is apparently extensively used in the academic debate context. It seems to me that alot of people think this recommends an ironic approach to the law. That what we should do is exactly what the law asks us to do and somehow this will be effective against the mandates of the law itself.

We should recognize, first of all, which I doubt many of the debate-types do, that when Zizek refers to the law he is not referencing empirical legal practice. The law is not the American penal code its a much more complicated process than that which I really don't feel like explaining. The Law is something which governs psychic processes rather than simply your ability to steal, get high, and kill. Nonetheless, the basic point about reading the law against itself means exactly the opposite of what it may first initally appear to mean. It is not to perform that which the law prohibits (though technically the Law really isnt simply a prohibition) and its also not to perform exactly what the law says to do in an ironic or sarcastic way.

Neither of those things are in any way transgressive to law. Since we can imagine the law as roughly superegoic (at least for the purpose of this situation) it is entirely down with your transgressions of it. Those only serve to make it more powerful, further entrench the role of the Law in one's psychic apparatus. The paradox of the superego is of course, that obeying it completely doesnt help either. Its like giving in to a little kid, if you answer their first "Why?" question you have just validated the idea of simply asking "Why?" in response to every answer, they will never stop.

Its the same as what Zizek was talking about when discussing anti-semitism during his presentation on the four discourses. Refutations of anti-semitism that take place on the level of the Nazi accusations are simply not effective. For instance, Nazis said that Jews were owners and managers of the large companies, that they were rich, that they were marrying German women, and that they supported Western or Communist causes. Well, as Zizek was bold enough to admit, they were probably somewhat right. There were alot of very prosperous Jews in Wiemar Germany, many Jewish men married German women, and many of them supported democratic or communist movements (not coincedentally, because they opposed National Socialism). These admissions, however, do not prove that the Nazis are right, because their error wasnt on the factual level but rather on the basis of the interpretation of these facts. Are they because of historical circumstances and simple population ratios or are they because Jews are out to dillute and destroy German purity? Obviously the one attitude is distinctly anti-Semitic. At the moment you accept the system in which Nazism was operating you have already surrundered all your best arguments.

The point which Joan was making is fundamentally the point and title of her book Read My Desire! To read the letter of the law against itself means precisely to read the desire of the law. Exposing the figure of the Jew as the objet petit a, the uncanny object, of Nazism, is ultimately the most effective critique of its ideology.

More on this later, I have been writing for a long time. I promise, I will explain how this relates to the "boob argument."

Peace,

MB-K

Thursday, April 17, 2003

Fucking Finally

So I have had ideas and inspiration to write all freaking evening but obviously, at those moments, the stupid blurty website thing was not working. Fabulous decision homres y hombrecitas. Regardless. I will recap a couple basic ideas.

New bar and grill Po'Boys, opened a couple blocks down Transit. It was advertised as a "Grill and Tap Room" which to me suggests having good beer on tap. I suppose I could even handle good beer in bottles. But, as I often forget, I am in Buffalo, New York, which, of course, has the worst beer selection of any other place in the world. Once we get next to Canada I guess Molson and Labatt's become local beers. Seriously, having Labatts, Molson, Sam, Killians, and Bud on draught does not a tap room make. Much to the contrary it is simply a standard everyday bar. Speaking of bar, they actually do have a pretty decent alcohol selection. Several different vodkas (VOX, Stoli and all the flavors, Absolut, etc.) a couple whiskeys (Makers Mark and JD), overall a pretty solid bar.

I would also like to note that DC has remedied one of the most significant problems of the later part of the season, as Audrey is back!! She rocks, she is very cute, very funny, and all around a wonderful dramatic foil for Joey. Time to talk to Katie on the phone. Since I have tomorrow off, I will hopefully add more.

Peace,

MB-K

Monday, April 14, 2003

Discoveries, Delicious Creations, and More Writing Projects

First of all, the discovery. I knew I had it, but had forgotten about it until I was digging my toaster out this morning. My Ice Cream Maker. It has never been used, though my parents had it for probably a year. It is a pretty solid one, a Krups La Glace. Very nice. Its among the newer generation of Ice Cream Makers wherein the automatic stirring mechanism and the liquid cooled freezing chamber make cranking and rock salt obsolete.

The delicious creation was obviously related. I started off with a basic vanilla custard ice cream. It is now undergoing the hard freeze, but from the taste of the soft freeze, it is incredible. I think I will move towards ginger next, but that is not for sure yet. Its a pretty easy process, heat up a cream and sugar base, with about 1/4 or 1/3 of the actual flavoring. Whip up a couple egg yolks and temper them in with the base. Cook that for about 5-8 minutes, never quite reaching a simmer, but heating up and blending. You have to keep the mixture moving at all times or the eggs will seperate very quickly. After you've cooked that mixture for about 8-10 minutes, you let it cool for a minute or so, and stir in the rest of the flavoring. After it cools completely you just pour it into the maker for about a 30 minute soft freeze and then off to the freezer for another half hour.

I will check the finished results alone and then top some of the brownies I made yesterday for a delicious brownie sundae. I will report, more likely tomorrow, about the overall results of my first batch of home made ice cream.

In terms of further writing, I am planning on engaging Nikki and/or Sarah at some point regarding the NDT sit. I talked with Andy about it and he seemed to think they would enjoy the conversation. I think I will iterate some of those initial ideas here before I actually send them an email, but my hard freeze is about 5 minutes from done. I'm not sure I'm as qualified as Katie to make the arguments regarding the potential influence or affects on other women, but I certainly will challenge the political efficacy of such acts. Andy sort of proved my arguments tonight, as I imagined he would. Okay, custard time.

Peace,

MB-K

Sunday, April 13, 2003

Sunday, Sunday, Sunday

Nothing happened today. Besides the fact that it is actually Sunday, I had no reason for titling this as such. Standard lazy day, a little homework got done, besides that, sitting around, bad television, missing my lovely Katie.

I have litttle to talk about besides how much I miss the old MSP/SP. I have seen an inordinate amount of beer commercials tonight and beer commercials always make me think of Summit. I love that beer so much, it really is the best I have ever had. The Summit EPA, no matter how far away I move from the TC, will always be the benchmark from which all beer is judged. Its not even really my first love. I drank veritably fuckloads of Ice House (as much as I hate to admit it) during high school and the first year or so of college. There was a period in there somewhere where I was big into MGD. That may have just been because it was cheap and available at Tom Thumb while I was working there. We had limited alcohol resources, obviously, so it was easiest to name a cheap beer that everyone would have, guarunteeing that we would end up with something to drink whenever Maroney/Wilking's parents were out of town.

It wasn't until my junior year of college that I started to do any serious drinking again and for the most part that was all Summit. Admittedly, I have Jen Watson to thank for teaching me the miraculous nature of this beverage. I spent a considerable number of nights at the Turf Club, Sweeney's, the Trend Bar, the roof of Jen's apartment, my parent's basement, Kiarina's apartment, Chang O'Hara's etc. drinking a good amount of Summit. While many of those nights were intially with Jen, they quickly spread out. I still tend to drink Summit exclusively whenever I am in a bar where I can expect to find it. I would imagine I have drinken more of that beer with Katie now then I have with Jen, but nonetheless, I have to give her credit for the original discovery.

I miss my Summit, I miss my Turf Club, and all the other wonderful things about Minneapolis and Saint Paul. Most importantly obviously, even above the most glorious EPA/IPA/Winter Ales, is that I miss Katie. Oh well.

On the bright side, it appears that there are only about 5 weeks left until I get to go home to pick up Katie. That seems like alot longer than it is, and I would imagine that once I get done with school the time will fly by, even if I am stuck at the WMPC all day. I also forgot to mention that it appears that I may be able to find another job, teaching reading shit to high school kids and such. I think it pays okay, hopefully I would like that better than developing photos all day.

Peace,

MB-K

Saturday, April 12, 2003

The Underside of Psychoanalysis-Delayed

So I know I was going to write about this shit yesterday. However, I got one of those standard "I fucking hate Friday nights" moods, so I went to sleep at 8:15 or so. I woke up and talked to Katie for a while at like 9:30. She went to a movie, so I went back to sleep, then was unable to sleep more, so I got some eats and finally was able to go back to sleep around 2.

Regardless, here is the deal. I know that Zizek is the hip shit right now in many parts of the intellectual community, but I don't know how many debaters (people who seem to want to talk about Zizek more than the average folk) actually read any of his real impressive stuff. I mean, Welcome to the Desert of the Real is a very cool book, I like it, and fuck, The Ticklish Subject is up there, in my opinion, one of his best. But neither of them are Zizek at his most Lacanian. Regardless, Zizek seems to me at least, to deserve all of the credit that he gets.

He was supposed to speak on the question of Deleuze and Cinema, but seems to have decided to speak simply on Deleuze instead. Apparently he recently decided to write a book on Deleuze, so it made since for him to talk about it. I'm not sure if Joan asking him to speak inspired him to write this book or if he simply got into Deleuze on his own. Regardless, he started off with a very standard criticism, which is, however, fundamentally accurate.

He critiqued Deleuze's (and, as may become important, Guittari's) concepts of multiplicty, the rhizome, multiple subjectivities etc. by recognizing their affiliation with contemporary developments in capitalism. Basically, everything that D+G talk about in the Anti-Oedips/Thousand Plateaus books are pretty easily co-opted, if we want to put it into that rather simplistic language.

However, he made a funny transition into discussing how contrary to simply trashing Deleuze, as is all too common and probably too easy for Lacanians, he wanted to rescue him. According to Zizek, the mission of this new book, which is slated to come out in September (but probably won't get published until December, he told me yesterday) is to "Rescue Deleuze from Deleuzians." The basic point of his speech was simply to articulate in what ways a couple of Deleuze's books actually succeed in deploying concepts which are fundamentally Lacanian, castration, the phallus, and such. All through this talk he was funny, I mean constantly funny. He concluded with, what I agree with him, was a hilariously insightful quote from Don Rumsfeld referring to the status of our knowledge regarding Iraq: "there are known knowns (things we know that we know, like the oil wells not burning) known unknowns (where the WMDs are, if Saddam is alive) and unknown unknowns (things that we don't know that we don't yet know." And the one that he missed, is the most important one, the best way to understand the fundamental fantasy: unknown knowns, things we don't know that we know.

Regardless it rocked. So I had a couple drinks on Thursday night and got up bright and early for the conference the next day. In all honesty, it was a really impressive list of speakers: Jean Rabbate, Juliet Flower MacConnell, Enernesto Laclau, Slavoj Zizek, Alenka Zupancic, and Mladen Dolar. The latter three are the Ljubiana people, both of which apparently got into Lacan after Zizek himself popularized it in Slovenia. Rabate didnt actually show up, but his paper was pretty good. Juliet MacConnel was very interesting, she gave a reading of the seminar (oh, I suppose I should say that the conference was named after and focused on Lacan's Seminar XVII, French title L'Invers de la Psychanalyse, which is being translated as either the Underside or the Reverse-side of Psychoanalysis-it is set to be released this Spring, but those dates have never been accurate in the past, so Joan advises us all to not get too hopeful, Zizek has approved the translation though, so its just up to the people at Norton now). Ernesto talked about Badiou and some stuff that was tangentially related to the seminar itself, his talk was on "An Ethics of Militant Engagement." The best part of the morning was by far Zizek's interaction with Laclau, it was pretty funny the way that they interact and how well they seem to know each other, especially when they are so different. Laclau, showing up everyday in his tweed suits and Zizek wearing the same shabby green shirt and faded jeans both days.

The afternoon just rocked from the moment it started. Zizek spoke about the four discourses (Seminar XVII is primarily about the four discourses) in general and the effects that flowed from them. Dolar and Zupancic dealth with specific aspects of those ideas, economy and Hegel to be specific. Both of them were very impressive, though I was pretty sure from Zupancic's book (which is absolutely incredible, if you haven't read The Ethics of the Real, you should) that she would be solid. I have only read a couple of Mladen Dolar's articles, but I think that alot more of his work is going to be translated into English within the near term. I will look forward to it.

That is all for now. Big hockey game tonight that I will actually get to watch. I think I might get some wings and enjoy it . SKI-U-MAH!!

Peace,

MB-K

Thursday, April 10, 2003

Zizek on Hold

So here is the deal. Zizek spoke today. I intended to write a long dissertation on how sweet he is and what he said. I, however, will have to come back to that as I made a decision to get really drunk during CSI. I will talk tomorrow both on the conference and Zizek's spectacular speech today.

CSI was great, it put Hitchcock and Jackass into relation. I loved it. Anyway, drunk. Going to watch TV.

Peace,

MB-K

Wednesday, April 09, 2003

The West Wing is Such an Incredible Show

So I have loved this show for quite a while. The fact that it follows the DC makes it an attractive option, I remember hanging out with Sanjay and KT in the latter's crappy basement apartment in uptown watching the show, smoking, drinking, etc. I was always pumped up for those shows and I still am, though in a "I have to watch the show sober and alone" sort of mode.

For a while I thought simply actually buying into the message of the show was naive. That it implied a fait in the actuality of American federal government. Upon watching the show more, getting really into it, and simply being fascinated by what is without question the best season it has ever enjoyed, I realize that I was wrong.

I could, and probably will at several times in the future, expound all the virtues of this program. Fundamentally, here is my point. The show is not just encouraging people to buy into the idea of contemporary politics. Its obvious, the more attention you pay to the show, that it is a fantasy. A government this liberal is a literal pipe dream. The idea is not that politics IS revolutionary, but what it would be like if it were. If ever we needed a show which at its heart was about hope, true hope for the people of the world and the causes that actually matter, we have it now. Admittedly, there are points where the show adopts a sort of mentality which allows some people to buy in that normally wouldnt. I think the significant moments of the show demonstrate very much that its not about supporting a contemporary version of America.

Okay, South Park is on, must watch and not type.

Peace,

MB-K

Tuesday, April 08, 2003

Fake Chipotle and "Final Hour" My Ass!!

So first of all, the good stuff. I drove home on a different route today than I usually would and happened to run across a strip mall which had a "Burrito Bay" in it. I thought to myself, that sounds like a Chipotle style place. I had inteneded to simply drive by and check it out, but I looked inside and could easily see all the chipotle implements. I decided that I would save the mac and chee for tomorrow night and have a burrito instead. I even figured that I could supplement my early evening burrito with some brushetta if necessary.

I walk in and notice that they have a burrito which is exactly the size of Chipotle's and around the same price. They also, however, have "THE GLUTTON" which is a gigantic burrito, damn near 1 1/2 times the size of a Chipotle. Beans, rice, chicken, all the same as Chipotle. Then come the differentiations, some of which are better, some of which gives Chipotle an edge. Burrito Bay has the lettuce, cheese and guac. They have the different salsas, though they do not have a corn salsa. Also, their salsas are much more obtrusive then those at Chipotle, which sucks. Next time I will just avoid the salsa. Normally I get salsa on my Chipotle because they dont just have tomatoes, well, Burrito Bay has solved that problem, they have tomatoes and onions and peppers. A big plus.

Being the phat/fat dude that I am, I could not avoid ordering a "Chicken Glutton," though I did in some ways feel bad about ordering it. Just saying that "I will have a glutton. Give me something gluttonous. I would like one of the seven deadly sins please." I mean, none of the other deadly sins work this way. You can't feel okay or even have a business at all if you call your big item "adultery" or "vanity." Maybe I am wrong and you can, but I still think its fucked up.

So in general I am pleased with Burrito Bay. They can count on me being back. I dont think I could handle one of the bigguns for anything besides my single-meal days though. They really are quite large.

I said this last week, but let me repeat that Buffy not being new sucks an ass. Especially when they try to fool me into thinking that it is, like I can't immediately tell what is going on in this episode. Jonathon isn't with the scoobies, hmm, I wonder when this was made. Stupid fucks.

The only plus of these reruns is of course that I got to watch American Idol. It now appears that Ruben is simply going to walk away with this competition. Dude is so fucking talented, just incredible. He is obviously not traditionally goodlooking, but they seem to be spinning him as a Barry White-style big sexy dude. I mean, even as a large man, I don't think that large men are ever really good looking enough to overcome that limitation. I think they look bad-ass, but not especially attractive. The point however, is that if there were ever any really good looking big men, it would be Ruben.

I really hope he wins. Dude can fucking sing.

Peace,

MB-K

Monday, April 07, 2003

I Need TIVO So Much

So, here is the deal. I have no problem actually choosing my prime time programming. The schedule is set and it will remain that way until something changes drastically. Don't get me wrong, I am not pleased that I dont get to watch Angel as it is on and tonight the big sporting event happens to come directly into contradiction with Married By America.

Initially Married by America was a lame show. The first two episodes bit. The fact that they claimed the show would be in the vein of Joe Millionaire made me give them some credit. So I stuck with it and come the third week, it was all there. The sex, the magic, the conflict, the cuteness, everything. I am totally for Jill and Kevin, but not to the same extent that I was for Zora. This show also is not nearly as good a program as Joe Millionaire, it lacks the clash of personalities that Heidi, Melissa, and MoJo provided. Still, the women are really different, and I'm not sure who is going to win.

No surprise, FOX is hooking the winners up with half a mil, something they have to be pissed about having seen Evan and Zora get a cool mill. Obviously its still a very sweet prize. I think Kevin and Jill have a better chance of being succesful, even though the fact that he wouldnt even kiss her for like 2 weeks was a little odd. Billie Jean is kind of skanky and her fiance's dad was right when he discussed that she seems like way too much of a party girl to settle down. It was, however, hilarious to watch Dwayne (sic), Billie Jean's flaming friend, cry his eyes out at the thought of losing his friend. It was ridiculously stereotypical, and though I felt bad for the dude I couldnt help but laugh.

Anyway, I miss this show tonight because I obviously cannot not watch the Cuse as they battle the Kansas Jayhawks for the national title. I am staying happy when Kansas scores on behalf of Katie and her father, but fundamentally I love this Syracuse team. After Saturday I was convinced that Syracuse couldnt beat Kansas. When Collison and Heinrich are on I still think they might be the best team in the country, but right now Carmelo, Gerry, Dwaney (brother of the best named player in the history of basketball "Dwayney Dwayney"), and Forth, among others, are just rolling. Maybe there really is something to this 2-3 zone, because Kansas, even with the varied perimeter inside, dish out style offense, cannot seem to get anything to go. It doesnt hurt that Gerry isnt missing 3 point shots and Carmelo is finding the open person when they collapse on him.

Anyway, back to the game. Oh, NDT update, Goof made finals. Once he wins the NDT about half of my losses my senior year in high school are immediately cleared away. Fuck, they were to the NDT champion, they dont count.

Peace,

MB-K

Sunday, April 06, 2003

Daylight Savings Sucks the Fattest Ass

Seriously, it didnt even really affect me this year, I went to sleep at like 1 last night and got up at 11 today, so I still got 9 hours of sleep, which is all I really needed. Usually I am up too late and have to get up way too fucking early so the extra hour really sticks it to me.

Today I just had to go to mass and do some work. The one thing that I really enjoy about mass specifically nowadays is simply that there are constant mentions of the war in Iraq and well developed prayers, thoughts, or dedications on it. It is one of those areas where I am simply 100% down with the Church's feelings on a social or political issue so I especially enjoy seeing it.

My work went similarly well. Paper 1 is finished!! Well, I am sure I will proofread it before I hand it in, maybe make a couple edits of a minor sort, but not significant work. So I am on track I think, I think I can finish all three of these by May 1st, but that may still be a little ambitious. It depends on how quickly this paper for Joan develops, we shall see.

I thought about making another load of Uber-schetta, but I didnt want to overdo it, plus garlic overdose becomes a real threat at that point. Instead I had a grilled turkey and cheese with crusty Italian bread and some homemade chilli mayo (which I would normally never eat, but was inspired by AB). Played some more GTA3 and actually succeeded in leading the colombians into the way of the Yokuza. I rock hard.

Beyond that this has been a chill day. No basketball, though my boys from Syracuse played strong. It appears that the Dobs may be rolling to Buffalo this weekend, but I wont get my hopes up on that respect, it is the fucking Dobs, we will have to see if he has any cash. It would be nice to have some friends up here though, even though there is shit to do. I could buy another controller for my PS2 and either rent or purchase NHL, depending on the monetary situation. Nonetheless, I really do hope the Dobstyle is able to suck it up and make the ride up to the Buffalo.

Anyway, I have now officially coached a debater who has cleared at the NDT. I rock, very very hard. Congrats Maggie, very impressive. Now Pete and I are working on becoming the television announcers for the newly formed Professional Debate Tour. "OH AND THE IMPACT TURN!!" "RVI!! RVI!! RVI!!!...ITS DROPPED AND GOD HELP US ALL!!" (latter thanks to Pete). Oot.

Peace,

MB-K

Saturday, April 05, 2003

Uber-schetta is Born!!

It rocks. It rocks so fucking hard. It is so garlicy and delicious. Katie wouldnt kiss me for days after I have eaten this delictable concoction. It went perfect with a very cheap bottle of pinot noir I got this evening as well. I really like this stuff, I am going to work on some alterations. Maybe some chili oil would be helpful. What if I briefly infused the olive oil with the garlic before it was allowed a chilled marinade. Some onions would be nice. Anchovies could work. There are so many possibilties. I could mix some parmesan regiano (there was some pretty good stuff on sale) in with the tomatoes and continue to top with the mozzerella. So many possibilities. Luckily I still have several tomatoes and peppers and quite a bit of garlic. Not to mention the half loaf of bread and still a quarter pound of cheese.

Seriously, ya'll are missing out. I am going to have one last piece of Uber-schetta and then a quick smoke before I move on to brownies during the last 10 minutes of what is shaping up to be a fantastic game between Texas and Syracuse. GO ORANGE! Carmelo-its not just candy anymore.

Peace,

MB-K

Bruschetta and The Final Four

A normal Saturday. I got up and did some work. I have enough written to be done with my first paper, but I dont think the argument is quite fleshed out enough. From what I have figured I need about another 2 pages, so I will hopefully do that early tomorrow afternoon. I did get some done today though, which I was happy about.

So I got done with that around 3 and played some GTA3. I was on a roll. I must have killed like 40 Colombian Cartel members in this one mission, which was an especially sweet mission. I also got a bullet proof Hummer which I proceeded to accidentally blow up, but whatever. It did come in handy when I had to attack them at the airplane hanger and trash their construction site. Motherfuckers. So I beat 3-4 missions and then failed repeatedly to succesfully lead the Colombian death squads which are tracking me to the trap set up by the Yokuza. I am also still unable to blow up the vans of the smacked-up mad people who try to suicide bomb me, but my bazooka is getting me considerably closer.

I decided that I should have something decent to eat for the Final Four, so I made another batch of brownies, this set included some tasty walnuts. I determined that I should probably eat some actual food, and I was out of milk regardless, so I scouted www.foodtv.com for some ideas. Mario was making a tasty bruschetta on TV and I thought, hmm, I like bruschetta, that sounds very good. So I decided to make it.

I went up to Topps and started with the tomatoes. I got a couple of garden-ripened reds and a couple good looking roma tomatoes. I added a good size head of garlic and gound a perfect loaf of extra crusty Italian bread. I added a good sized chunk of smoked mozzerella, which was shockingly resasonably priced. I of course already had the good olive oil, but I decided to head down that aisle regardless. I saw some Red Chili Oil, which I had been thinking about anyway because AB mentioned it several times on the "Mayo Clinic" episode (see two days ago). I didnt want the chili oil now, but I thought a little kick could spice up my bruschetta.

So I walked further down the aisle and found a good selection of canned chilis. I chose a very small can of processed chipotles (smoked jalepenos) which were simply seeded, not even chopped, very nice. I came home and diced two of the roma tomatos and half of one of the garden riped. I crushed 3 large cloves of garlic, and diced one of the chipotles. Mixed all that shit together in a bowl, drizzle with olive oil, top with about 1/3 cup of cheese, salt and pepper to taste and let sit. Once that is all stirred together the olive oil will pull all the flavors togehter, but it needs about half an hour to really come together. So, I am watching the start of the second half and just waiting, patiently waiting. Soon I will prepare my bread, throw it under the broiler, and enjoy what I think I will call "uber-chetta," but we will see how well it comes out.

Kansas is beating the hell out of Marquette. They dont look beatable at the moment. I hope the final is a little closer, even if I do cheer for Kansas. This just isnt much of a game.

Peace,

MB-K

Friday, April 04, 2003

Food Network Does it Again

So the Food Network has again allowed me to add to my list of life goals. I have finally found a place which will actually allow me to eat free. The Riverview Hotel and Casino in Laughlin, NV has a 1 1/4 pound burger on a 12 inch roll which is free if you can eat it all. Alright, solid deal for them I'm sure. The burger only costs like 8 bucks, which is solid, so if someone couldnt eat it, they would still possibly order it. Most people probably can't eat a burger that large, but lets sit down and actually analyze it.

The burger itself is 1 1/4 pounds, but the difficult part is the bun. If you watch professional eaters you will notice that what they do is often dunk food in water or other liquid before trying to eat it. The biggest problem with attempting to eat something really fast (which is not an issue here) or eating alot of something is simply that it dries out your mouth and throat, it absorbs all of that liquid which normally lines your digestive track and makes eating more difficult. I routinely am able to eat Manning's 14 oz Jumbo Special with cheese and bacon, as well as a plate full of fries or potato chips and half a basket of what are without question the world's best onion rings (oh my God, I am getting so hungry as I write this, I have not had a cheeseburger in like 4 weeks now, only 2 more to go). 14 oz, notably, is only 2 oz less than a pound, practically negligible. One of the reasons I think the Manny's burger is not too difficult is because the grease soaks the bun so thoroughly that it is less massive.

So in the abstract, I think I could pretty easily handle this free burger. Its 20 oz, so less than another half of a Jumbo Special. I dont have to add the bacon, I wouldnt have any fries or onion rings. The bun, however, looks huge. Its thick, like a round loaf of bread. The burgers on the show did not appear to be as deliciously greasy as those at Mannys, but getting them more undercooked could help in that respect, as would ketchup, mustard, and no lettuce (which has a tendency to prevent the grease from soaking into the bun as it should) would grease up the bun well enough. Look, the point is, I would never have a problem eating this burger. I have only been to one restaurant which has offered me an "if you can eat it its free" deal. That was at NFLs in St. Louis after my senior year. There was a pizza joint which had that deal with what I believe was a 38 inch pizza. Its roughly the size of a round outdoor table.

Well, Bob probably would have given it a shot with me if I had really wanted to. You actually win money if you are able to do it, like 1000 bucks if two people can do it within a half hour while also drinking a pitcher of beer/soda each. I didnt feel like pressing it, however, because I am not sure I could have pulled it off. Thats alot of fucking pizza and that is really not my specialty. If I ended up at one of those 72oz steak joints, I think I would give it a try. Even though meat would be my eating specialty, I am not sure I could actually do it, but I would have to take a run at it.

So here is the dilemma-why the fuck would I ever go to Laughlin, Nevada? If I am going to the state of NV at all I am going to Vegas. I suppose if I lived nearby I would make the drive, but I would so drastically prefer never to live near Laughlin, NV that it seems ridiculous. I am not going to go to an inferior gambling town or vacation spot just to get a free burger. For the price of that extra trip I could just BUY a fucking burger as large as I felt like eating. Regardless, I wish to eat this burger.

Peace,

MB-K

Fuck Spring, I Can Live With Freezing Rain as Long as there is Lobsterfest!

So I got up this morning and was a little optimistic that class would actually be cancelled at ole UB. For some reason, however, the folks who run the University seem to make their decisions entirely independent of every other institution in the Buffalo area. Literally, every fucking school in town was closed besides UB. All the colleges, all the high schools, even way the fuck up here in Lockport. It seems that it would be more dangerous to have a college than a high school in session. Alot more people are involved, most of them are driving, and they tend to drive longer distances. High school kids often take busses and usually go to school near their homes. They even had the cahones to put up a message on the News line which literally went "Offices are open and classes are in session at UB today. However, road conditions are extremely dangerous so please attempt not to drive or use extreme caution when doing so." Extremely dangerous out there so dont drive. Just fucking teleport yourselves to class or something. Ricockulous.

So after I spent about 20 minutes running my car to heat the windows up enough to loosen the 1/2 inch of ice which accumulated last night, I was able to chip most of it off within another 20 minutes. Areas that could easily gather snow however, like the hood, trunk, and roof of the car, had compacted snow which had been saturated with nearly frozen water. Hence about 4 inches of thoroughly solid snow still covers my beautiful beige Mazda. Regardless, I rolled to school and actually had a decent turnout in my class, something I was not expecting seeing as most of my students commute from downtown. Class was, as usual, uneventful for the most part. One of my students however, is apparently pledging DZO, the sorrority from MTVs Sorrority Life 2 filmed here in Buffalo. This is "Hell Week" and apparently she had been outside this morning getting covered with grape juice and shaving cream and syrup and other nonsense, which she was not allowed to shower off before going to class. I felt really bad for her and I dont like the idea of hazing rituals in general. I think there are probably some friendly ways people could pledge their commitment to each other. I just hope she doenst feel obligated to do this type of thing to gain strong friendships or anything. She's a smart young woman and she seems to have several friends in class too. Hopefully she will look back on it with fond memories, revisionist memories obviously, but fond ones nonetheless.

So after class I dutifully sat in my office and worked for about 3 hours, during that time I wrote some (if I do say so myself) incredible shit and am almost totally finished with the 1st of these papers. My goal is to be done before Monday, so I am a to the g. Finish it up before the games tomorrow night I suppose. I was in a great mood at this point. Katie's phone is working and I was able to talk to her after class. That always brightens me up as does feeling accomplished. I can't eat alot of the things I love on this Friday afternoon, not even chicken wings, and I didnt feel like cheese pizza. What I did feel like, was the loobster!!!!

I had seen the commercial a couple days ago, and it stuck with me. Lobster and shrimp, 13.99. Great deal I say, absolutely great deal. A decent size (6 oz) Maine lobster tail and 15 breaded fried shrimp. I upgraded to the lobster mashed potatoes, tasty garlic mashed with a cheesy-lobster cream sauce and chunks of lobster meat. I highly recommend them, among the best taters I have had in a while. I opted for the salad, since I think the only other vegetable I have had this week is a couple sticks of celery with my Tuesday night wings. Notably I doused it with bleu cheese dressing, but fuck, I still ate the lettuce, cucumbers, and tomatoes. Damn the fat, its not like its going to be noticeable in regard to what is already there. Accompanied of course by 2 baskets of the fucking awesome RedLob biscuits. They are so cheesy and buttermilky and wonderful. Apparently Katie found a book which has the recipe in it, I might have to do some research in that respect.

Here is the point, when life gets you down, go to Lobsterfest. I honestly cannot stress this enough. I had my usual Friday afternoon blues, but they were largely diminished by my succulent seafood dinner. It wasnt too pricey, I think it came to like 22 dollars including a beer and a tip. In all honesty it was only a 10 dollar splurge since I would have spent at least 12 bucks on a cheese pizza tonight. It brightened my day and now I feel content and tired. I will probably drink a little and fall asleep early. At least I will get to talk to Katie after she takes her bath-wet girl over the phone is still wet girl after all!

Peace,

MB-K

Thursday, April 03, 2003

AB is God

I cant believe I have written like 17 entries in this thing and not mentioned another of my favorite programs and its amazing host. I refer of course, to Alton Brown and the entertaining, informative, and delicious Good Eats. I started watching this show occassionally before I was really even into the Food Network. I remember last Christmas at my Grandparents' house in St. Louis staying up until like 3 in the morning with my bro, both of us pissed that we were not able to land any smoke before we came, debating whether to ask our Uncle James if he had any, and switching between Comedy Central's Roast Week and Food TV.

Look, I shouldnt have to describe to you what Good Eats is. Since I am actually only writing to Katie I can say definitively that you do know what Good Eats is, but if I avoided saying anything on here that Katie might already know, I would really have no point in doing this in the first place. I will describe it, but you should watch the show, its incredible. Really is one of the best programs ever made. The fact that I still dont have the dvds is ridiculous.

So here is the deal, you can check out ABs website (www.altonbrown.com) if you want more specific biographic details, but basically he is trained in both cooking and science. He knows his shit when we are talking food and also fills in a shocking amount of scientific explanation to back all that up. I was decent at chemistry way back when, so I roughly understand what he is talking about, but I would imagine that for people more knowledgeable of the physical arts, this show would be even more interesting. Likewise, I can easily see AB going over certain people's heads, no matter how much he attempts to dumb it down. There is actually a really cool pattern to his explanations, he says it in complicated speak pretty quickly and makes some witty comment about how no one could understand that, then breaks it down into more regular language, and finally illustrates the whole thing with some wonderfully absurd and comical puppet show.

I havent thorougly explained enough how fucking hilarious my man AB is. Seriously, he has a very intelligent sense of humor while at the same time being sort of wacky enough to appeal to the lowest common denominator. His fascination with those little rubber googly finger puppet things rocks, they tend to represent the micro-bacteria which have to be killed in one process or another. His relationship with W, his sort of boss and antagonist who helps him in the more spy-themed shows (which there are alot of I should note), is always fucking hilarious. When he brings in his evil twin brother (obviously just AB with different hair color), for instance in the pickle episode (an overly fantastic episode, even by Good Eats standard) is equally hilarious.

There was also an episode whose name I can't remember (the names of the titles are also fabulous, the episode I just watched on mayonaisse was, of course, "Mayo Clinic") which was an hour long special mocking Junkyard Wars and other shows of that ilk. AB was in competition, as he often is, with some other cook. They were both put into a junkyard bringing with them only a few necessary ingredients and had to utilize the junk around them as cooking implements. I dont remember what his competitor did, but AB converted some old lockers into a smoker and made some incredible-looking smoked bacon. It may be my favorite episode, but there are just so many to remember, its hard to choose.

In my continuing theme of sharing with Katie (and theoretically others) things that she already knows that I like) I wanted ya'll to understand and tune in to the magic that is Good Eats. Unfortunately it typically runs up against the West Wing (9 Eastern Wedsnesdays) so I dont get to see it much anymore, but whenever they bring back the Good Eats marathon, I am fucking there. Rock on.

Peace,

MB-K

At the Very Least, Something is Right With the World

Katie's phone works again!!! Yay, yay, yay, yay. I am so very very happy, I dont think I can even explain to you how butt-shatteringly happy I am that I will no longer simply have to talk to Katie on the internet. The whole IM thing is kind of cool and shit, but it is definitely a fundamentally supplementary form of communication. You can use it when you are doing work or when you are watching TV or if you are at work or something. Any situation in which you are near a computer and where it would be difficult for one to mangage talking on the phone. As a primary means of interaction, however, it kind of blows.

I personally have no ability to detect sarcasm, anger, depression, or the like from anyone over this form of communication. People can tell me something that they only meant as a joke and I'll be like, "damn, really, that shit is whack." The only way I have yet figured out to solve this problem is to explicitly note when one is being sarcastic with a "justkidding" sort of note at the end of the message. That I may dislike more than not being able to detect sarcasm itself. The point of sarcastic and ironic comments is that they are NOT MARKED as sarcastic or ironic. At the poitn you note that they are all the rhetorical force is sucked out of them.

Regardless, I got a fair amount of work done today, got my check and am back to solid financial footing, and attended a lecture which convinces me that I can do the shit I am trying to do. The woman who was speaking was neither brilliant nor an idiot, but was definately not out of range of what I am doing now. Admittedly she was talking about post-colonialism which I tend to believe is simply a less complicated field than psychoanalysis, though that is likely simply a personal belief. I certainly don't have anything to back it up, so you understand.

I am now aiming at finishing my first paper by the end of this weekend so that Monday can be the first day of working on my paper for Joan, which I will dedicate around 2 weeks to. That will leave me with a week and a half's worth of work to get the paper for Gasche done by the end of April, which would be really sweet. It obviously wouldnt be much of a problem if I didnt have that one done until some time in May, I would just like to be done with school come May 1st. That way I could take a week off before I got started on my increasingly large summer reading list. I think at this point I am still shooting for the rest of the Critique of Pure Reason, Phenomenology of Spirit, maybe the Critique of Practical Reason, re-read Lacan's Ethics seminar, since I havent read it since I was a junior, read Seminar XVII when it comes out, and probably tackle Joan's new book. Assuming I am working 40 hours a week at Wal-Mart that may be a little too ambitious, but I guess we will see.

I feel like I should be using the summers to at least get reading done without any time limits, but I have to make sure I actually do that reading knowing that I will not immediately have to write on it. I could also add some Badiou to that list, Levinas even, in order to get ready for the class I will take with Laclau this fall. I have at least read Badiou's Ethics and a couple essays, but the more I know the more I can get out of it.

I do have my class schedule nailed down for next fall, Heidegger and Aesthetics, Affectivity and Political Radicalism, and Contemporary Ethical Thought/Thinkers. I am very pleased with this schedule, though at some point I probably should deal with literature. I really dont want to, although, I am aware that I need to have at least some experience with literature if I have any hope at all of someday getting a job anywhere. We will see about that I guess. Regardless, I will finally get to talk to Katie tonight!! No more sitting on my couch almost falling asleep when I would rather be lying in my bed on the phone. Alright, back to Survivor, I have missed so many weeks of this show I hardly know who is still left. The whole "Tourney Time so we will run Survivor against DC "is incredibly weak of them, but I guess, what ya gonna do.

Peace,

MB-K

Wednesday, April 02, 2003

Antigua

I have officially decided that instead of being alone in cold, lonely, stupid Buffalo, that I would much rather be on a white sandy beach in Antigua. I can imagine it now, drinking a frosty margarita made with premium tequila (I'm thinking Petron or Des Guapo) with Katie right next to me. We would have little umbrellas and pieces of fruit in the drinks and sip them luciously as we watched the sunset over the Ocean, illuminating what is now an uncountable multitude of shades of crystal blue water. The last glimmers of the sun bouncing off the water and flickering off Katie's diamond as we walked along the edge of the beach smoking a cuban cigar, with or without the actual tobacco inside.

We could relax to poolside while the steel drum band played some Gloria Estefan. More margaritas and I'm thinking pig roast on the beach, Hawaii style but in the Carribean of course.

I could go on all night, but I think I will make myself jealous of myself. Since I would imagine this to be a recurring fantasy until my papers are actually turned in, I will probably begin again at the pig.

Antigua, it will be mine. Oh yes, it will be mine.

Peace,

MB-K

Why the fuck has the Pizza Hut in My Town Learned Shit About Shit

The internet can in some ways be confusing, but for the most part anyone can handle it. There are some things that are just really fucking simple to do. Most of the time there is just a button that says submit and you have to fucking press it and whatever you typed goes to whoever you typed it to. Reading things off a computer is even simpler. It is exactly the same as reading things off other media, like type or television. If you cant read off a computer, you simply cannot read. There is no special computer skill involved in reading.

So I dont know exactly how it is that pizza joints run their online ordering systems, but if they are not absolute fucking morons this is essentially how it should work. You order a pizza online. The pizza place's computer receives a message which it displays on the screen which indicates what you want and where you live. The person who would normally take the order via phone does whatever the fuck it is that they would normally do if the order was called in. The people make the fucking pizza and they fucking deliver it. You can complicate this shit if you want to, you can make the message show up in real time. You could have the computer respond with an email to all the orders it receives. You could put in a little system where you click a button when the order is accepted, which sends a reply email, and another one when the order is on its way. You could add all the fucking bells and whistles you want. I really dont think it would take much work, I bet Ari or Kevin or Flury or any of those fucking computer folk could do it in a couple hours or something. Maybe I am wrong, but I doubt it.

Regardless, the stupid fucks at the Lockport Pizza Hut do not yet have online ordering. I think its fucking inexcusable. They already have a computer dont they, you cant pretend that they keep all their records in a fucking paper ledger. Its probably hooked up to the fucking internet already. Notably, its not like that would cost them more than dick-fifty anyway. I can already conclusively tell them that they have lost at least one pizza order based on the fact that they do not have online ordering. I am sure they will lose many more until they get it together.

Admittedly, there may not be alot of people out here who would initially order pizza online. That would change, however, very quickly. Put a flyer on every pizza box that explains the process and fucking everyone would try it. Imagine how much time that saves for the workers, it takes 5 seconds vs like 2 minutes to take an order. Fuck dude. This shit doesnt make any sense, Pizza Hut is a bunch of fucking morons. For some reason Papa John's, who I think definitively has the best fucking pizza chain out there (online ordering, great fucking deals, good cinna stix, good chicken fingers, and simply great pizza) doesnt have any fucking locations in all of fucking Buffalo, not just Lockport, all of Buffalo. I mean, I am aware that this town blows more ass than ass itself would blow were it able to blow ass, but there are like a couple hundred thousand people here, why the fuck does Papa John's not think this market to be worthwhile. Economic recession, blah, everyone fired, blah, people dont stop ordering pizza. Fucking rickoculous.

Thats all for now. I am going to saute a chicken breast, but I really have nothing to serve with it. I am out of garlic, cheese, pasta sauce, tomatoes, and all other forms of vegetables. I guess I will flavor it with some good Hungarian paprika that I picked up, but its still just a chicken breast with paprika. This almost makes me wish I wasnt so fucking lazy. Not enough to go get anything, just enough to wish that I would.

Peace,

MB-K

Tuesday, April 01, 2003

BTVS-Countdown to the Final Hour

I admittedly, have not watched this show the whole way through. I mean, I have seen every episode, but I didnt start watching the show until Season 5 on a regular basis. I have seasons 1-2 on DVD, still no available money to get season 3, though it is pretty much on the next priority list.

FUCKING WEAK!! They made it seem like it was a fucking new episode, I didnt even think to check. I just figured that since the sesason was coming to a close that they would actually show new episodes. In my quest to make sure I didnt see any possible spoilers I have been avoiding all the regular BTVS websites, so I didnt even notice that they were just playing "Sleeper" again this week. Sleeper, probably not a coincedental reference to what became famous as terrorist "sleeper cells" after 9-11. Its a good episode, but this is not the point.

Last week's episode was one of my all time favorites. It had some of the elements that I especially love in other episodes of the show. The episode about Spike's being sired and the two slayers he killed is fantastic and this has many explicit and not so explicit references back to that show. Spike is in the position that Homer was in for a while on the Simpsons, it was difficult, but the writers realized that some of the best moments in the show are when you concentrate on him. The one good thing which has so far come out of the repeat is that when Spike is burying his new victim, the cute blonde girl we realize he killed while in the thrall of the First, he is whistling the folk song that his mother will sing to him in last week's episode.

I had hoped to just talk randomly during this whole episode about the things it reminded me of, but that is obvioulsy not going to work.

I will mention that now I get the opportunity to switch between American Idol and Buffy. I really like American Idol, I wish that it didnt conflict with the best show of all time so I would never miss it. I only got to see the last few episodes last season, this year I have gotten enough to know all the contestants. Kimberly is good and very hot, but the big dude, I cant remember his fucking name (he sang Sweet Home Alabama and Whole New World) rocks. He is my favorite but I doubt he can win, hes not a great looking dude, but what a fucking voice.

One other random note, the movie Identity looks like it could be really really sweet. John Cusack in a movie that looks like it may be combining some of the aspects of Usual Suspects and maybe even Hitchcock. Can't wait to see it.

Peace,

MB-K